A grounded starting point for making sense of something that’s too often misunderstood.

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What this section is—and isn’t

This is not about autistic kids.
This is not about “overreactions.”
This is not about autism stereotypes.

This is a clear, compassionate entry point into understanding adult autistic meltdowns: what they are, why they happen, how they’re different from other crisis states.

It’s also a starting point for understanding what actually helps before, during, and after (though you’ll find much more detail about helping autistic adults in the Support section of Unstrange Mind.)

Whether you’ve had meltdowns yourself, seen someone experience one, or just want to understand what’s going on beneath the surface, this section offers context, language, and insight.

What you’ll find here:

  • Definitions and boundaries — what is an adult autistic meltdown? And what isn’t?
  • Signs and sensations — What it looks and feels like (internally and externally)
  • Common triggers — Not just “sensory overload,” but the deeper systems at play
  • Support strategies — What helps—and what often makes things worse? (You will find more targeted support information in the Support section)
  • Misunderstandings to unlearn — Why common responses fail, and what to try instead.

This is a starting point—not a diagnostic tool, and not a checklist of quick fixes. It’s a map drawn from lived experience, research, and deep listening.

Hi, I’m Maxfield Sparrow. I am not a medical professional—I am an autistic adult who has experienced meltdowns my entire life (and I still have meltdowns when I try to (or am forced to) do or experience more than my nervous system is wired to handle.)

The information on this site comes from my decades of studying research, learning about my own triggers, testing changes in my own life, and listening to other adults who experience autistic meltdowns. Welcome to my Unstrange Mind.

Field Guide to Adult Autistic Meltdowns

  • What is an adult autistic meltdown? — Definition, boundaries, myths, and busting stereotypes
  • Why meltdowns happen: Triggers & thresholds — Internal and external stressors, systemic overwhelm, and invisible buildup
  • What it feels like (from the inside) — Autonomic dysregulation, loss of speech/hyperverbal, internal fragmentation, pain—described in lived terms
  • Meltdowns vs. other crises of dysregulation — Distinctions from panic attacks, shutdowns, tantrums, CPTSD responses, etc.
  • What helps: before, during, and after — Concrete support strategies, both internal (self-awareness, pacing) and external (environment, relationship). More specific detail will be found in the Support section.
  • Why meltdown knowledge changes everything — Understanding meltdowns (yours or someone’s else’s) can make the difference between harm and help, between shame and dignity, between exclusion and support.
  • Gifts hidden in fire — Meltdown is sometimes the most regulated choice a body can make. Reclaim meltdowns as protective, communicative, and catalytic—not in a silver-lining way, but in a grounded, post-crisis wisdom framing
  • FAQs about adult autistic meltdowns — responding to questions from allies, clinicians, autistic folks, and more

There’s no single way to move through these pages—start where you are. Whether you’ve lived through meltdowns or are trying to understand someone who does, I hope what you find here helps you feel a little less alone. This is one part of a larger resource. You can explore more through the main homepage, or follow one of these threads:

Learn more about supporting an Autistic adult who experiences meltdowns in the Support section.

If you are an Autistic adult who experiences meltdown, check out The Hearth.